Sunday, September 20, 2009

The Rest of the Story....

My last post was short.....for obvious reasons. I'm sure many of you have questions so I will summarize the past week. Last week we were supposed to get together with L and make our cooperative agreement. We had yet to decide a day and by Wednesday we set a meeting up for Friday. The agency asked if we could contact her and they would attempt also...but she will usually call me back first. I couldn't get ahold of her. I knew this was bad since she knew we were planning on meeting. I basically played phone tag by myself for a few days since no one was calling me back....not L...not the agency. By this time I knew in my heart things were over. When I finally got ahold of L through text she said she wanted to wait until the e-father talked to the agency again. Remember him...the one who signed his rights away a long time ago. At this point I was very stressed and knew I couldn't handle this situation anymore. I truly believe the expectant father wants to parent despite that he does not have the resources to do so. We decided to walk away from this match since the chance of adoption is now very low. Our social worker stated that it may still come together at the very end...but we are now back in the books and have no obligation to L. Since she was not calling us back I sent her a text wishing her best of luck. She responded by saying not to give up hope yet. I feel bad for her situation as I know she really wants to place this child with us. At the same time she is letting the father live with her...and ultimately he is controlling her. After a few sad moments I feel better than when we were matched. I feel like a ton of bricks has been lifted off my shoulders. I don't like drama...and this was way too much for me. We are still hopeful that there is a child for us...and that they will find their way home. Thank you for all of your prayers and warm wishes. Once again...hardship reminds us how blessed we really are...baby or no baby.

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